Friends of the Program

Case of the Mondays

January 5, 2009 · No Comments

We use the same joke as the fat middle-aged data entry clerk in your office when you ask her how her day is going (even though you really don’t care) to bring you our favorite links from the weekend…

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A Below Average Photo Essay: Cotton Bowl Farewell Edition

January 4, 2009 · No Comments

The last Cotton Bowl to be played at the Fair grounds in Dallas should be enough to motivate us to make the trip over to Dallas for the New Year.  Throw in the confluence of crazy which occured with Mike Leach and Houston Nutt on the sidelines and you had us at the first “Giggity”.  We braved two hour pregame traffic jams, sketchy downtown Dallas neighborhoods, and the mysterious attraction of confectionary fair food to bring you the following visual homage…

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We are Live from the 2009 Cotton Bowl Classic, where clearly crowd control and traffic flow are of the highest priorities

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→ No CommentsCategories: Below Average Photo Essays · College Football · FOTP Field Trip

Ole Miss, Setting Records All Over Dallas

January 4, 2009 · 1 Comment

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Rebel fans, winning in all phases Friday

The Ole Miss players werent the only one’s setting records at the Cotton Bowl on Friday, it seems the Ole Miss fans, immediately after their team’s pasting of #7 ranked Texas Tech Red Raiders, took to the watering holes of the greater Dallas Metro Area to set a few historic marks of their own.  The Atrium Bar at the Hyatt, one of the Ole Miss fan hotels, reported that victorious Ole Miss faithful went all Wild Rebel on the bar and set a record for money spent on booze in one night, the grand  bar tab total coming to a little over $29,000.  That record came two days after those same fans tied the one night record by dropping $26,000 at the bar on New Years and, not to be a fan base to rest on their laurels, dropped an additional $27, 000 the night before the game.  The Atrium Bar has been open for 30 years.

[HT: OMSpirit, Mayor Thew]

→ 1 CommentCategories: College Football · Ole Miss Football

Andre Smith Announces What We All Knew Already

January 4, 2009 · No Comments

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He’s gone, gone, gone. Off to the land of milk and honey and millions of dollars…and VIP access to strip clubs. Though, we’re sure it’s typical for any college football player declaring for the NFL draft to release his “official” statement through a lawyer. Then again, not every player has to answer questions from the state attorney general. Wonder why he would have a lawyer considering he  ”did not talk to an agent prior to the Sugar Bowl and has not hired an agent.” Of course, considering that statement came from a lawyer, you have to wonder what the words “talk”, “agent”, “prior”, “hired”, and…”Sugar Bowl” really mean.

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LOLHOUSTON

January 3, 2009 · No Comments

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→ No CommentsCategories: College Football · Ole Miss Football

The Evil Elf Returns to Coaching

January 1, 2009 · No Comments

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For some reason, the University of North Alabama decided that  5′7″ running backs are the key to a successful football program as the school hired the former Auburn head coach and ABC analyst Terry Bowden to be its head coach. So does this mean that Terry is finally off the Auburn payroll? Expect the UNA program to implode in about 4-5  years.

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The Shrimper to LSU

December 31, 2008 · 2 Comments

okumutaeThe Shrimpin’ Boat Captain has returned home to the swamp.  Fire up the pirogue and someone wake up Bruce Feldman,  because the Red Bull express is full steam ahead in search of the golden fleece-lined pelts of 5 star recruits  to lay at the feet of The Hat.  Orgeron, reportedly, will receive $600K a year and be allowed to wrestle Mike the Tiger whenever he wants.*

*may not be accurate

UPDATE: Entire story may not be accurate. The Shrimper to Rocky Top?

→ 2 CommentsCategories: College Football · LSU football

Texas Tech, Hoss Snead Demands Your Respect

December 30, 2008 · 1 Comment

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Cotton Bowl ‘09:  Two really awesome mustaches enter, one really awesome mustache leaves

There are lots of intriguing match-ups in this years Cotton Bowl.  You’ve got the Dread Pirate Leach with his vaunted death by 5 wide offense and general skullduggery versus Houston Dale and his moonshine jugs of homemade crazy.   There’s Graham Harrell and Michael “I never knew my roommate was a Derrick Ferreal-level coke dealer” Crabtree matching scoring drives with Jevan Snead and the dread-locked penny racer otherwise known as Dexter McCluster.  And theres the massive flesh pressing between Tech’s mammoth Oline, led by some guy who fancies himself the second coming of Smash from Demolition, and an Ole Miss defensive line, led by Merchant of Violence , Peria Jerry.  Yet, all of those are undercards to the facially follicalled fracas to be played out in the periphery between the father of Ole Miss quarterback Jevan Snead and Texas Tech’s blatant Yosemite Sam rip-off, Raider Red. 

We introduced you to Mr. Snead (we don’t know his first name, but for the purposes of this post, he will, from this point forward, be known as “Hoss Snead”) in the early throws of the season, unintentionally of course, but after some expert sleuthiness from our friends over at the Nafoom Board, we discovered that he was in fact the patriarch of the Snead household.  And so it was destiny that the two greatest mustaches in college football should meet in their respective season’s final game to determine who is the bigger total bad ass in this scenario.

The completely one-sided breakdown of the match-up after the jump.

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→ 1 CommentCategories: Bunkie Perkins · College Football · Ole Miss Football

A Below Average Photo Essay: Christmas in Sin City

December 30, 2008 · No Comments

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Well, the Medallion family survived its second Christmas Vacation in Las Vegas last week. As for me, I lost all my money, was entertained by some strippers at the Spearmint Rhino (yep, they’re open during Christmas), was propositioned by a hooker that had a Michael Strahan-gap tooth (probably useful in her profession), and realized that English was the third fourth most popular language spoken in Vegas during the week (hey, not everyone celebrates Christmas or is from the U.S. and A).

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No Sugar For Andre

December 29, 2008 · No Comments

andesmithAlabama’s Outland Trophy winner and general displacer of other large human beings, Andre Smith, is out of the Sugar Bowl.   Bama says a violation of team rules, which we hope means getting caught swinging from the spiral staircase at Rick’s Caberet while clutching a frightened John Parker Wilson stripper under his arm, all to the backgrond accompaniment of Unskinny Bop.  Ah New Orleans.

→ No CommentsCategories: Alabama Football · College Football