Friends of the Program

Degenerate gamblers by nature and birthright, your humble blogging hosts Bunkie Perkins and Michael Medallion, and other special guests, try to give you some guidance as you wager your plasma donation earnings on this week’s games.   

Alabama +6 v. Clemson (in Atlanta)

BP:  Clemson.  Usually Im a sucker for a team that has a quarterback with impressive flowing locks, but not even I can deny the gravitational pull of an over hyped Clemson team that is destined to have at least 3 horrible loses this season.

MM:  Clemson. C.J. Spiller keeps the Olympic spirit going as he puts on a track meet in the Georgia Dome. It will look something like this except the players chasing him will have red helmets and an all-powerful midget coach. 

Tennessee -7 @ UCLA

BP:  Tennessee. UCLA only covers if the referees allow both teams to play two hand touch.  The injury bug has set up permanent residence in Westwood to the point that I think a full contact game may result in UCLA having to cancel the rest of the season.

MM: Tennessee.  I asked Coach Neuheisel who he was taking in his football pool, he said to take Tennessee. We suggest you do the same.

Illinois +8.5 @ Mizzou

BP:  Mizzou.  Can’t you just imagine what Chase Daniel will look like 15 years from now…bald, 240 lbs, mustard stained wife beater, smoking Pall Malls outside of his trailer on the lake in Branson selling discount tickets to the Andy Williams Theater shows…ok maybe not.

MM:  Illinois.  The Fighting Zooks end Chase Daniel’s Heisman hopes early. Don’t worry Mizzou fans, Bunkie can teach you how to take that Chase for Heisman bumper sticker off your vehicle. Many years ago, he was able to get his Deuce for Heisman sticker off his car with little effort.

Mississippi State -8.5 @ La Tech

BP:  Louisiana Tech.  Mississippi State will be so shocked that a college town in the contiguous 48 could be worse than Starkville that they’ll come out flat and get the ol’ Montreal screwjob treatment in Ruston.

MM: Miss. State.  The Techsters get Croomed in the comforts of their own home. State fans learn that there’s a place worse that Starkvegas, and that place is Ruston.

Memphis +8.5 @ Ole Miss

BP: Ole Miss.  The game isn’t in the Liberty Bowl so the teams wont have to fear for their lives and instead can just focus on football.  The Houston Nutt Big Tent Revival and Motorcade of Crazy rolls into Oxford to do faith healing and magic shows, that alone is good for a cover.

MM: Memphis.  Nutt gets the win, but your wallet wins by taking Memphis. Don’t worry Tiger fans, your team doesn’t have to shoot free throws.