Friends of the Program

Ryan Mallett is About to Have All of the Scantrons Ryan Mallett Will Ever Need

September 21st, 2010 by · 3 Comments

It has long been a mythical tale of Message Board lore…a tale with no substantiated evidence that it ever happened but, as most of these stories go, enough believability to assume that at least part of it may have happened.  Such is the case of Ryan Mallett and that ominous piece of coded paper that every college student comes face to face with at some point in his or her college career, the Scantron form.  Story goes that Mallett, wanders in to class one day, a class that is moments away from taking a test or quiz of some sort.  Mallett, finding himself devoid of the needed Scantron to take the test/quiz, polls the class, in the third person…and thus ‘Who’s got a Scantron for Ryan Mallett?” was born. 

But now, with Mallett’s rise in the Heisman ranks following a dramatic win at Georgia last week, and the impending matchup with #1 Alabama this week, some members of the student body, via Facebook,  are coming to #15′s aid, making sure he is fully prepared for the game…or perhaps an upcoming quiz.

I’m sure by know we’ve all heard the tale of Ryan Mallett and a particular green sheet of paper last semester. What better way to fulfill his request than having the entire student section bring a scantron for our Heisman-caliber quarterback?

Here’s how you can do your part:

Some time this week (the earlier the better) go to a Club Red on campus and purchase a pack of scantrons (it’s like 5 for a little over a dollar). Keep the …scantrons until Saturday, and once you get into the stands pass them out to everybody around you.

Rally towels will be handed out to the first 5,000 people, but for the announcement of the starting line-ups and whenever Ryan does something particularly scantron-worthy, let’s hold those up loudly and proudly.

Make fun if you must, but I like that scantron worthiness is the new measurement of success.

Categories: Arkansas Football
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3 responses so far ↓

  • 1 vhdawg // Sep 21, 2010 at 4:57 pm

    This is clearly an impermissable benefit. He should be suspended until the weekend after the Mississippi State game.

  • 2 Johnny Hammersticks // Sep 21, 2010 at 5:08 pm

    Hmm…rally towels and scrantrons…wonder if they’re going to pass out pooper scooper bags and yell “We’re behind ya!” the whole game to complete the trifecta.

    Jeebus….

  • 3 David // Dec 9, 2010 at 7:33 am

    Drew Pomeranz owes me a scantron from Theatre 101.

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