Dwight David Honeycutt is Now on Twitter is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

 In the total-est of all frat moves, the local Arkansas chapter of Kappa Sigma is here to remind all you destitute and down trodden, all you disinfranchised and hopeless, all you citizen activists looking for answers from your country’s Government and financial institutions…that having a trust fund is pretty freaking sweet, bro. [HT: Fortner]

The Occupy Dickson Street Movement in Fayetteville is Not Going Well is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

In related news, Reggie Fish has not yet been booked to appear, but Im sure he’s available.

[HT: BroBible]

Midget Wrestling to Appear in Its Natural State is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

The following story of a chance encounter is submitted, unedited, and without comment from TigerdDroppings.  Enjoy.

I met a girl (Arkansas fan) that had a semi-unsuccessful breast augmentation. During the procedure, one of her nipples did not survive the surgery (they remove the nipple and place it back on the breast)… anyway, the doc said he recommended either a fake nipple or a tattoo nipple. This girl declined both and went to the tattoo shop herself and got a razorback nipple. True Fan!

Evidence of said tattoo, after the jump.

Fake Breasted Hog Fan Takes Lemons, Makes Lemonade is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8teAeByob24

The flash rave phenomenon non phenonmenon thats been a bit played out for more than a year now has reached the Ozarks, as a decent smattering of Arkansas students broke out the beach balls and glow sticks in front of the library on campus over the weekend.    As you can see, the whole thing loses steam really quickly, which indicates a low supply of excstacy and the other substances that would normally accompany such activities.  In such a high meth lab concentrated area, I would have expected more from the Hogs.

 See the rest of the videos here.

[HT: Brodacious]

I Blame This on Glee, Ole Miss, and Auburn is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

Dwight David Honeycutt of Conway, Arkansas recently ran for a seat on his fair city’s school board.  As you’ll see in the video below (produced and expertly shot by his brother Roland), he’s a man of principle, a man of conviction, and a man who will beat you with an inch of your life with a trace chain if you so much as look sideways at his old lady…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMRWNNBYAc8

Sadly, Mr. Honeycutt did not win his bid for school board.  Apparently the good townfolk of Conway aren’t as progressive as us outsiders were led to believe.  Yet even in defeat, he held a rally of sorts for his “constituancy”.  The “Dwight David Honeycutt Sweet Tea Party” as it was called, saw an always agitated and noticably sweaty Dwight David Honeycutt speak to the masses. Luckily a witness had an explanation for the perspiration.

Most all stood at attention when Dwight D. entered the room. He looked much like he did in the video. Tall. Solidly built, if not obviously “bear strong.” Bespectacled. Generally peeved-seeming. And profoundly sweaty. Because he feared the spotlight? Because of the small band of vocal protesters out front, brandishing signs like “Up With Decency, Down With Honeysmutt”? Because he spent the early part of the evening doing George Dickel shots with two spandex-clad strippers? Probably a little bit of all of the above.

As expected, Honeycutt was quite gracious in defeat tipping his cap to the two candidates that had qualified for the run-off election.

“Go to that Blanche Lincoln/Bill Halter debate,” he said. “Neither one of them are gonna tell you the truth. That they love reefer, and XBox and sex. But they do! How could they not?! They’re awesome!

“Sure, I want one of those airplanes you can land on a lake. I want a hovercraft. And a pet alligator. I want a claw-foot bathtub on my deck like in the Cialis commercials.  And Blanche Lincoln wants those things too! Why won’t she just level with us?!”

Nevertheless, Mr. Honeycutt has reveled in his newfound fame and may in fact frequent the local Chili’s a little more often…

“I’d be lyin’ if I said I didn’t love it. I had a girl approach me at the Chili’s bar in Conway and had me sign her tits. I mean, right across ‘em. Last year at this time I wasn’t signin’ any tits. 2010’s been a big year.”

I encourage you to go read the entire account of this event. If for nothing else to appreciate a man who counts as his political qualifications “going on a four-day mescaline-and-sex binge with Linda Ronstadt.”

Enjoy.

Dwight David Honeycutt Needs Your Vote is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

vs.

We’ll go out on a limb here and pick the LSU fans. The LSU co-ed in white shorts is the MVP.

CWS: Arkansas Fans vs. LSU Fans is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

We are coming to you LIVE with a MST3K inspired (but in the most elderly and infirmed of ways) view of Baum Stadium

The Arkansas Diamond Dolls were happy to see us…this will be a recurring theme

The Rebels, poised for victory

These guys, not so much

Gratuitous Diamond Doll Shot

Picture from Matt Snyder’s flank, no homo

Mike Bianco, coach, leader, victim of excutiatingly long stadium expansion projects

A fine southern baseball tradition, excessive drinking in left field

The aftermath of timely base running and poorly executed relay throws…really gruesome, divert your eyes…

…ok, thats better

There were lots of leisurely jogs around 3rd this weekend…

We mean alot of them

And some pretty stellar pitching

Kobe and, apparently, shutter speed stopper, Ronnie Brewer was in attendance

As was Arkansas fan, seen here wearing official team merchandise we guess

The team store also does personalized items

Used to only cook hamburgers…oh sweet irony, you win again

Gamesmanship is hot visiting team bat girls

Teamwork is choreographed situational hand signals…

Obviously…

Congrats to the SEC West Co-Champion and Arkansas-Sweeping Ole Miss Rebel Baseball team.  And because a tie is like kissing your sister…we give you more video of the Diamond Dolls…who are probably somebodys sister.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBoKIMHlJr8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfqL6SlFDA4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy044s4kYRA

The End.

A Below Average Photo Essay: Sweeping Up Fayetteville Edition is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course

Can never be too careful when it comes to swine flu. The students in Fayetteville are taking every precaution. [HT: Fortner]

They're Taking Every Precaution At Arkansas is brought to you by Friends of the Program - Sports and Culture...All Under the Table Of Course