It’s hard to top Randy Travis’ public intox arrest where he was found passed out drunk in the parking lot of a Baptist Church in Dallas…that of course is unless you are Randy Fucking Travis, that is.  Randy Travis sees his public intox and raises himself drunk driving a 1998 Trans am into a construction [...]

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I cannot understate how little is going on today.  It’s so underwhelming to the point of exhaustion…you, know that level of tiredness where you could pretty much lay down and fall asleep pretty much anywhere out of sheer boredom…or from a Oklahoma 3.2 beer hangover, whichever. If you are able to keep your eyes open [...]

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One of the more established facts of life on Twitter is that Darren Rovell is a huge bag of douche and will ultimately ruin everyone’s good time with some mundane marketing news horseshit.  This is not a recent phenomenon, as it turns out, he’s been doing it for years. (Edit note: get over there, this [...]

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This mugsot, forever and ever, amen Do you see that Nashville, what with your skinny jeans and pop-infused country thats too cool for the fucking room…that’s how a real country outlaw gets down with a public intox mugshot…just sneering into the the camera as if to say “Yeah, I got picked up for drinking outside a Baptist [...]

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FOTP would like to send out a special Happy Birthday to the first woman that any of us ever truly loved, Tiffani Amber Thiessen.  Bayside’s  first lady may turn 38 today (if this doesn’t make you feel ancient, nothing will), but she’ll always be our head cheerleader.  (We do not recognize short haired-Brian Austin-Green lovin’-90210 Kelly (Christ, eat [...]

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How are they supposed to return to normal activity NOW? A) Dog The Bounty Hunter is on campus. B) What if he is after YOU? C) Bounty Hunters are a growing problem in Tennessee, like Vampires in Santa Carla.

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Hey Maurice Jones Drew, what do you think about Clay Travis holding a roast for himself?  Yeah, me too. So, lawyer, cheerleader marrier, and expert in Alabama-based bulk retailers of fashionable menswear, Clay Travis, had a  a roast for himself last night.  I almost can’t type that without entering into the throws of a grand [...]

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