This week on Friends with Muscles, we try to bridge the gap of apathy between Pittsburgh and Birmingham for Panther fans.  We brought in Chris Peak from Panther Lair to preview the upcoming BBVA Compass Bowl between Pitt and Ole Miss and to allow Birmingham’s favorite son, Rick Muscles, to make an impassioned plea to Pitt fans everywhere about the merits of short intervals of time during the holiday season spent in the Magic City.  We also made a lot of sweater jokes when we found out that Pitt’s defensive coordinator’s last name is Huxtable.

Peep the show here.

The svelt body type may throw you a bit, but that voice and neatly parted auburn quaff is undeniable ..that swash-buckling son-of-a-bitch putting the moves on Vanna White and making David from Chicago uncomfortable about revealing his sexual preference to a national television audience is none other than CBS College Football studio host and Finebaum caller-instigator Tim Brando.  Sadly, this audition, and probably the palpable sexual chemistry between the host and the letter turner lady, did not merit Timmy B with the full time gig on “The Wheel”.   Day time game show’s loss is Spencer Tillman’s friendly mid-show banter’s gain.

Had Brando somehow landed the job over the very Canadian Pat Sajak, we might have seen a little more of this sports caster jumping over and trying his or her hand at the game show circuit thing.  Below are just a few of the possibilities.

Verne Lundquist/This is Your Life

“In your life have you ever…oh, well yeah, I guess you have.”

Brent Musberger/Card Sharks

Brent finally getting paid to openly gamble.

Chris Berman/The Newlywed Game

Just making newly married couples uncomfortable one leather reference at a time.

Gus Johnson/Press Your Luck 

Imagine Gus calling this.

Bob Costas/Jeopardy

He has all of the answers, just ask him.

John Gruden/The Dating Game

Constantly refers to Bachelor #1 as “This Guy”

John Madden/Win, Lose, or Draw

His drawing skills on the telestrator qualify him for such a job.

Rob Parker/Hip Hop Holdem’

No one’s “blackness” is getting questioned here.

It’s been well documented that Johnny Manziel has had a hell of a run these past few months, what with having a festive Halloween, beating Bama, getting called on stage at every concert he goes to, winning the Heisman, scoring a hot girlfriend…you know, the usual stuff…but now, after his appearance, and chance meeting on Jay Leno,  Johnny Football is just rubbing it in all of our faces at this point

 Just not the same without the leather mini skirt

• Lay ALL OF THE POINTS in the BCS National Championship Game [SBNation]
• Check for some great sports betting ideas online
• AJ McCarron’s chest tattoo, still awesome [LobShots]
• Jack Del Rio’s son spurns Jaguars, walks on at Bama [RollBamaRoll]
• Auburn and Tennessee are aligning themselves with the Irish [TTFB]
• North Dakota St. is calling folks out [Busted Coverage]
• Bain is set to consume Gotham Baton Rouge [ATVS]
• Kliff Kingsbury is all up in Tommy Tuberville’s personal space [Dr. Saturday]
• Tommy Tuberville crawled through a river of shit and came out clean on the other side [EDSBS]
• Bret Bielema is adding to his Arkansas staff one former Wisconsin assistant at a time [ArkNews]
• Not a surprise, but Jarvis Jones is probably going pro [Macon.com]
• Tennessee just needs the right quarterback [GoVolsXtra]
• Dameyune Craig is cool where he is, thanks Auburn [AL.com]
• Comparing Hugh Freeze’s offense to Houston Nutt’s…oh thats just mean [RCR]
• Mississippi State gets to scrimmagin’ [Clarion Ledger]
• Les Miles, efficient Christmas shopper [ShreveportTimes]
• The Big East and Mountain West should stop playing coy and finally just get together [TSK]

 (clears throat)….and now, an Auburn Bro Haiku:

War mirror self pic

That coral necklace tho PAAAAWWWWLLL

Left nip is ALL IN

Please feel free to leave your own Auburn Bro Haiku in the comments.

[HT to Rick Muscles for the pic]

Still trying to decide what to get that discerning Auburn fan in your life for Christmas?  You know what always makes a nice gift?…a Calendar.  Those things are handy, colorful, and its the type of gift that keeps on giving all year long.  I bet Auburn even has one for sale in their official store or something, why don’t you go chec…

…oh.

You know what would make a great gift? Socks.  Everybody needs socks.

[Via]

The University of Tennessee announced the hiring of the rest of Butch Jones coaching staff today via their official website.  due to the immediacy of news the way it is today, sometimes it is more important to get the information out there and then put the finishing touches out there later.  This is the only thing that explains why a multi-million dollar athletic department, when wanting to make their newly hired football assistant coaching staff to look a little more Tennessee-y, turned to MSPaint to doctor their photos rather than something a little more professional looking.

Luckily, I’ve got nothing but time and vast Microsoft Paint skills on these hands, so I helped the UT Athletic Department design staff out a little bit and finished up the project they started.